Title: Notice Me
Author: Christal
Fandom: Star Trek The Next Generation
Pairing: Riker/Troi
Rating: PG
Notes: This takes place after Nemesis and all, the couple is married
and on the Titan. I am going to place this at least a year into
their time on the Titan (but for the most part you can place it
however long or short their time is on the ship).
Warnings: Uhm, ok fair warning this is an offshoot of the quote
challenge (the one from Zlanna, but I changed it up a bit) and
something that Tolshikhan said about a pirate Riker (although it
didn't bring up quite what yall think it would have). I never
intended for this to get written at first, but then I started
listening to "Everytime" and the bunny would not be ignored. NOT
FLUFF!
Summary: Tensions come to a head for the newlyweds aboard the Titan.

The turbolift doors opened and Deanna Troi Riker exited. She paused
as the lift doors closed behind her and the lift scurried off to the
next request. She looked down the long hallway and thought about the
events that had led her here.

They had only been on the Titan a little over a year and it had been
rough. The council had thrown Will some of the hardest assignments
there were at him. It was quite well known that one or two of the
admirals back at headquarters didn't like Will or his command style,
and because of their animosity he had gotten stuck with quite a
few `gray area' assignments. They were lose/lose situations, but
Will had been strong and stuck by his decisions every time.

She started to walk towards Ten Forward, knowing he was there
waiting for her. Her pace was slower than normal, her body betraying
the feelings of terror and desperation she tried to keep locked away
in her heart.

Nameless crewmembers passed by her on their way to the lift and then
their own quarters. They would slow down and wave or smile `hello'
to her, but Deanna was a million miles away. She kept a smile
plastered onto her face, and to everyone else she looked as if she
were intricately following the pattern of the carpet and the doors
to the lounge in front of her. She didn't see any of it though. She
only saw the images of the past few weeks.

Deanna looked up; she had come to the end and stood before the doors
to Ten-Forward. She took a deep, shaky breath and walked numbly
through. She glanced around and saw that the lounge was practically
empty. Most of the crew were either on duty or sleeping at this
time. She noticed her husband sitting in a booth towards the back,
his face hidden in the shadows of the corner.

She walked over –when had Ten-Forward gotten so small? – and sat
down opposite of her Imzadi.

Will didn't even glance up as she sat. He just took another sip of
his ale and continued to look outside the window.

"When did you get back?" she asked.

"Four or five hours ago," he said without looking at her.

Deanna swallowed; when had he stopped needing to see her after
missions?

"How are you?"

He shrugged, "I don't know." It was a vague answer, one that she
knew she would understand by the end of the night.

"How did everything go?"

Now he did look at her, a look of pure disbelief in his eyes.

"How do you think it went," he stammered, getting slightly
flustered. "We spent all that time telling those people that we
cared about them, that they wouldn't be forgotten. And what happens?
The Federation pulls out and says a half-assed `sorry' as it flees
to some other territory the Romulans gave them to sweeten the deal."

Deanna lowered her eyes. She knew it was going to happen, but at one
time she had hoped.

"Maybe we could transport some of…"

"Some of them? Deanna, some of them isn't enough. They all deserve
to be saved."

He emptied his ale and laughed deliriously. "And the icing on the
cake is that my orders are to leave immediately for the Devron
system. They won't even let me THINK about saving some of them. They
made me go down to that planet and give those people hope, and now
they are forcing me to leave them to the wolves. How can I do that?"

Deanna was silent. She didn't have the perfect answer.

"You could defy orders, stay longer."

Will paused, knowing how much this was hurting her. He clenched his
jaw and snorted, "They already told the Romulans that we would be
out of here by no later than 0500 hours. If we stay longer it will
look like the Federation was breaking the peace treaty."

They sat there in uncomfortable silence, neither knowing what to
say. He looked into her eyes, into the pain that he knew he created,
and inwardly cringed as he thought about what he was about to do to
her.

Will Riker pushed the empty mug to the side. Sighing he took his
wife's hands and placed them between his palms and answered the
question lurking under the surface with one of his own.

"Haven't we both known this day would come?"

Deanna choked back a sob, her last hopes dashed.

"Will, please…"

He placed a finger against her lips to silence her.

"If I don't, then who will?" he whispered.

Tears slipped down her cheeks unchecked.

"I could come with you," she begged.

Will shook his head.

"No, you'd be hunted just like me. I couldn't live with myself
knowing the danger I was putting you in. And you could never go home
again. You would never again see your family and friends or have any
contact with them. You couldn't live like that, it would kill you."

Deanna closed her eyes tight, "Not seeing you would kill me."

Will swallowed; it was taking everything for him not to cry. He
swallowed several times and took a deep breath.

He hesitated; he couldn't say it. After everything he had put her
through already, after making up his mind and telling himself he
would refuse to change it, he was hesitating.

So he changed the subject.

"Did you go to sickbay?" he asked.

She looked up, realizing that he was having second thoughts. She
nodded.

"Are you alright?"

Deanna opened her mouth to speak, but then closed it again. She
lowered her head and nodded. She would not make this decision for
him.

"Good" he said.

Will got up from the booth and pulled Deanna up with him. He hugged
her fiercely before turning to leave.

"I'm going to my ready room. I know you have some counseling
appointments. I'll see you tonight."

She looked up into his eyes, nodding her okay, but she did not
smile. She heard the words, but his eyes betrayed.
~*~*~*~*~*~*
Deanna walked from the turbolift to her quarters. Her appointments
had been mildly successful, but more work would have to be done with
them. The work had consumed her mind for the past four hours,
successfully diverting her attention from the tense situation
between her and Will.

As she walked down the hallway she wondered how tonight would be.
She still had to go back to sickbay to schedule another appointment,
but she wanted to spend the night actually communicating with her
husband.

She paused outside the doors to their quarters and took a deep
breath. Then she entered.

She stopped breathing… for two seconds. She looked around and
sighed, she had seen it coming.

The place was a mess. She drifted into the bedroom and noticed a few
bags were missing. She went to their dresser and opened the first
drawer. Empty. The second one… empty.

She closed them slowly and walked to their nightstand. There next to
their wedding picture were Will's pips. He was gone and no one would
know when he left or how he had escaped.

Next to the pips was the divorce form, all signed and waiting for
her to finalize.

She walked out of their bedroom and sat down on her sofa and just
stopped. She didn't blink, didn't move, she didn't even think.
Deanna just sat and didn't realize how much time had passed until
the door chime stirred her.

"Come" she announced mechanically.

The CMO walked in.

"You said you were going to come see me to make an appointment," he
chided.

She looked up puzzled, and then lightly laughed as she remembered
what he was referring to.

"I'm sorry doctor, I've been preoccupied."

The doctor smiled.

"Well that's to be expected. So how did the captain take it? I'm
sure he was grinning from ear to ear."

"He doesn't know," she whispered.

Confusion crept into his eyes.

"What do you mean? I thought he would be happy to know he was going
to be a father. He loves kids."

"Yes he does," she replied.

The End
ok please don't hurt me, and I promise that after this whole thing
is finished I'll write a nice piece of goopy mush to make up for it
all. The artist in me just needs this to come out.

Inspired by the Quote challenge (I changed the exact wording a bit
though to fit more my style and what I needed it to say):

Will Riker pushed his empty
ale mug to the side, placed his wife's hand between his palms and
answered her
question with one of his own. "Haven't we both always known this day
would
come?" – Zlanna

And "Everytime" by Britney Spears (yes she is evil but the song is
beautiful):

Notice me
Take my hand
Why are we
Strangers when
Our love is strong
Why carry on without me?

Everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, it's haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I make believe
That you are here
It's the only way
I see clear
What have I done
You seem to move on easy

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I may have made it rain
Please forgive me
My weakness caused you pain
And this song is my sorry

Ohhhh

At night I pray
That soon your face
Will fade away

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you baby

END