My very first Imzadi story....very short, and very sugary.
and no they don't belong to me.....Frakes, Sirtis, and Paramount owns em all.

He reached out in the darkness trying to find the manual light switch beside
the bed. His sheets were soaked with sweat, and his hands were trembling. The
glow from the new found light surrounded him.....offering him shelter in the
midst of his mind's turmoil.

The dream had invaded him each night since he'd returned home to Alaska.....a
vacation he'd looked forward to for months. He climbed out of bed, and stared
at himself in the mirror. <You look like Hell> he spoke to himself, still
trying to shake the sensation that surrounded him.

She had been his first love, and until Deanna he thought he would never feel
that way again. But now for some reason she had again invaded his heart and his
mind. He threw on his clothes, and headed out into the Alaskan night. The
frigid air stung at his lungs, but he breathed in deep...filling himself with
the familiar sensation. His destination wasn't far, and he reached it before he
knew it. He'd told himself he'd never return here, to the place they
called,,,,,Paradise. But now he was being pulled further, and further down the
path, by a will much greater then his own. He reached his hand to his neck, and
massaged the medallion that Deanna had given him before he left.

"Make peace with your past, Imzadi." She'd said, as she placed the medallion
around his neck. He had never spoke of her, but somehow Deanna had searched his
soul, and come out with the truth. The guilt, and emptiness had become a part
of him, and running to the stars hadn't help him escape. The pain had kept him
from making so many decisions....but mostly it had given him an inability to
commit to anyone. Even Deanna, who had touched him in a way he never thought
possible. He owed it to her to face his demons, and forgive himself.

He felt his stomach churn, as the sound of the falls, and the familiar scents
of 'paradise' sent his mind back to a time so long ago. Brushin some snow off a
stump, he sat down and let his mind drift. Away from Deanna, away from the
enterprise, to a place and time he'd hoped he'd never have to face again.

His eyes scanned the scenery each time avoiding the base of the cliff behind
him. The warmth of his tears stung at his cheeks, and endlessly fell on the
snow below him.

<I'm sorry Deanna, I can't do this.> He got hope, and prepared to leave, his
eyes still hiding the sight behind him.

"Turn around Will Riker." without turning he let the sound of the voice
saturate his being, the sound of the voice he thought he'd never hear again.

"I'm sorry, Jeyna" he spoke the words aloud, not knowing if it was for his
benefit or hers.

"Sorry for what, Willy?" she laughed as she said his name. Her laughter was
just as he recalled sweet, and musical, and quite infectious. He felt a smile,
he didn't quite feel sweep across his face. He needed to turn to face
her.....but she were only in his mind, he feared she be gone.?

"Willy? Haven't heard that in......" his words drifted off.

"That's because I was the only one who had the courage to call you that."

She was right, even as an adolescent, his tall frame had intimated most of his
friends. But not her, at all of five feet.....she was afraid of nothing.

"Show me how brave you are Riker. Turn around and look at me."

He didn't have to turn to see her, her face was permanently etched in his mind.
Her wide dark eyes, dancing with sparkles of light, wisps of gold framing her
face, and her smile.....her smile was softer then the snow falling around him.

"I won't look at you, Jenya." He stood like a statue in the snow, his arms
folded, trying to hold on to any strength he had left.

"I was you first love, Willy. Deanna is your soulmate, your Imzadi." She
hesitated for a moment. Will could picture her face as she tried to construct
her thoughts.

"Willy and Jenny, till death do us part......Do you remember?

His facade of strength crumbled with her words. Falling to his knees he cried.
He released himself like he never had before, feeling all the pain, and all the
hurt he'd suppressed for so long.

"I killed you Jeyna.....it willnever happen again!" He spoke the words much
louder then he'd meant to. "

"William Thomas Riker! You listen to me....you made a command
decision.......the only decision you could have made!"

He could picture her brown eyes flashing with fury, her tiny body drawn up in
such a way, that she could intimate even the largest of Klingons.

"When you died in my arms......I vowed I would never love anyone under my
command. I'll never face that again Jenny.......NEVER!"

"That's right Will, I died in your arms........you were there for me just as
you always promised.....till death do us part. Let me be there for you, by
giving you back your life. Forgive yourself so I can be free."

<Forgive yourself so I can be free> He repeated the phrase over in his
mind..........Jeyna's face slowly dissolving in his his mind, being replaced by
her. He could feel her without opening his eyes.


Of course she would be here. Where else would she be when he needed her the
most. He wrapped his arms around her waist, and pressed his head tightly to her
stomach. He didn't speak, he allowed himself to drown in the pleasure of her

Deanna stroked his hair, as her senses were filled by this new man that held
her. A man without doubts.....a man who loved her, like he never had before.

Her eyes were drawn to the shrine at the base of the cliff.....pieces of a
lifetime carefully preserved in a glass case. So many questions swirled in her
mind, but for now she was content with the pure love that encircled her.

"I love you, Deanna Troi."

The silence was broken by the words she feared she'd never hear again. His eyes
met hers, mirroring the words he had just spoken.

"Deanna....Imzadi" He stayed on his knees, moving his hands from her waist, to
her hands.

"Marry Me."

"Is that a question, or an order, Commander?" Her eyes danced with the light of
the stars.

"Question." he smiled, as he pressed his lips to her hands.

"Ofcourse I'll marry you, Will."

He rose off the ground, sweeping her in his arms, the satin of his lips pressed
gently against hers. She pulled herself away, to look into his eyes.

"Till death do us part." She whispered. Will shook his head, and placed his
fingers to her lips.

"Till forever, Imzadi.........till forever.