What Makes Them Happy
Disclaimer: I don’t own.
Time: Takes place after Insurrection and before Nemesis.
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Will downloaded the message onto a PADD before reading it. He had a date with Deanna and he was going to be late if he didn’t walk out the door that very minute. He glanced at the computer screen while he fixed his collar, skimming the message from Command. He dropped the PADD in his hand and fell back into his chair behind his desk.
Someone else would have been extremely excited to read was he had just read; but they were not in his particular situation. He was confused and didn’t know what to think or what to do. They had offered him promotion before, but they had not offered him the most advanced starship in the fleet.
Star Fleet had torn him away from his Imzadi before and he wasn’t going to let them again. ‘But, the Titan,’ he thought. Will was excited about the prospect of commanding the Titan, but he loved Deanna. He loved her more than he could ever love any ship, but she always said that their love wasn’t worth their lives.
Will didn’t want to believe that now.
Will sat in his chair afraid to move. He didn’t know what to think. ‘I have to . . . I’m going to . . . I won’t let this happen again! But, the Titan. Wow. I can’t leave her . . . Not again! Not after we just . . . It’s working out now . . . and . . . But the Titan. . . . “Our love isn’t worth our lives” she said . . . I want to . . . But I love her.’ His thoughts were choppy, he felt dizzy and a little nauseous. Who said the mind can’t influence the body feeling sick.
Will thought for a moment and looked to the dresser and saw the small box he had bought a few weeks ago on shore leave. He had toyed with the idea. He had his own doubts, not about what she would say. He had his doubts about what he would do, how he would act, would he really make her happy? ‘Is this really a good idea for us? Are we happier now than we would be then?’ Will had so many unanswered questions.
‘Do I want to rush into this?’ he asked himself. ‘Well, I’m not really rushing in . . . This isn’t that fast.’
Will stood up triumphantly. “I’ll do it!” He said aloud. “I’m going to ask Deanna to marry me!”
Will sat back down quickly, feeling the blood rush to his head for standing to fast. He felt unsure again. He started to breathe heavily. “What if this is a mistake?” he asked himself quietly. ‘What if Deanna thinks this is a rushed decision? What if she’s right? What if this is a bad idea? There’s no turning back once we start down that road.’
“No,” he said to himself. “No, I’m going to do this. This is what I’ve wanted!” he growled to himself.
Will stood again, slower than before. “I’m going to do it!” he said to himself forcefully.
“Troi to Riker.”
Will jumped at the sound of Deanna’s voice. She had startled him. “Riker here.”
“Will, are you coming? You were supposed to be here five minutes ago.”
“Sorry, I lost track of time. I’m on my way,” he replied quickly. Will picked up the PADD and the box and walked swiftly out the door.
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Will was excited, between the promotion and the wedding coming up that the bride didn’t know about. He smiled to himself and read the letter. Will felt exhilarated. Before getting too close to Deanna’s quarters he calmed himself and wiped the smile off his face, trying to hide the surprise from her. He remembered how he first felt when he saw it, he remembered to fool her.
Everything had to be perfect, meaning she had to expect nothing.
He walked into her quarters and she stood to greet him with a kiss. He didn’t really respond to her touch and she felt something was wrong.
“What’s wrong?” she asked looking into his eyes, searching for answers.
He handed her the PADD and held onto his memory, his wonderfully fooling memory.
She nearly dropped it when she read it. She knew how Will felt about the Titan. She fell into his arms crying. She knew what this meant and she was afraid; just as Will had been.
“Imzadi, it’s okay,” he whispered comfortingly.
‘Life before love, what was I thinking telling him that?’ she screamed at herself. She looked up at him. “Not again, Will, not again.”
“No, not again,” he whispered gently. He began to loose his memory but he didn’t care. Things were happening fast and it excited him.
She looked at him questionably. Deanna felt confidence and energy growing him and she felt happy. She didn’t want to feel happy, but Will felt happy. Either he didn’t want her as much as she wanted him, didn’t love her as much as she thought he did or she was missing something.
Will dropped to one knee and held the ring out to her.
Deanna didn’t stop crying, but a smile filled her face. She felt truly happy.
“They won’t do it again, Imzadi.” He stood and took her in his arms.
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It had occurred to Deanna that Will might have rushed into things. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to marry him, she did. She loved him a lot and she knew that. She just realized that the promotion and the proposal might be even more related than she thought.
Deanna knew that Will loved her, but she didn’t know if this was really a good idea. ‘Am I ready to get married?’ she asked herself over and over again. The thought was always replaced with: ‘Is Will ready to get married?’ She didn’t have either answer, this made her upset.
They had a date later that night and she was going to ask him. She sat on the couch in her office and thought.
Will walked in, “Ready to go?”
Deanna lost track of time and was startled by Will’s voice. “Oh, Will.”
Will stepped forward and let the door close behind him. He tilted his head. “Is everything okay?” He sat down next to her.
Deanna took his hand, and took a deep breath. “Will,” she started, “Will, do you think that you might have rushed into this?”
He was taken back by the question. His whole perspective changed. ‘What if Deanna doesn’t want to get married?’
She saw the look on his face and tried to explain herself. “I mean, with the promotion and the Titan. I don’t want you to regret anything.”
“Deanna, do you not want to get married?” he asked quietly.
“No, it’s not that. I just thought that you might have made a decision too fast and we might be rushing.” She sounded unsure to him; he was not used to her being confused. Will was confident that he knew what she wanted, and that reassured him a bit.
Will framed her face with one of his hands. He smiled and stared into her eyes. “Deanna, I should have married you years ago. I’ve been dancing around with the idea for a while now, seriously considering it. Well, you’ve seen me dance. . .” he joked and she smiled. “The promotion and the Titan just made me see what a fool I’ve been being. And I know that you want this too. So let’s get married.”
She was a little surprised by this. Deanna stared at him a moment longer before answering. She considered what she felt and what she sensed from him. She could tell that he really wanted to do this and that made her very happy. “Captain’s orders,” she replied. He wrapped his arms around her small physique.
“Let’s get married,” she said pulling back and looking into
his eyes. Her smile made him very happy.